Monday, March 12, 2012

What Week Is This?

I received a very anxious, upset phone call from my mom late afternoon yesterday. She told me that she wanted me to know that Dad was in hospital in a lot of pain, very sick, and not doing well. The tone in her voice made it sound as if Dad was on his deathbed.

Back up to this time last week (Monday), Dad WAS taken to the hospital because of pretty serious swelling in both his legs. Turns out he was admitted for 3 days due to weak kidneys which caused the swelling. Medications were moved around and 'redone' for him and he was sent home on Thursday.

Now back to yesterdays phone call from Mom....I asked her if he was in the hospital right that very moment. "YES" she said.

Me: Who took Dad to the hospital?

Mom: Diane and me. (Diane is Mom's caregiver)

Me: Which hospital did you take him to?

Mom: Baptist East. Wait a minute....Diane, which hospital is Hal in?

((I hear Diane in the background say)): "he's in bed, asleep."

Mom: OH.....((long pause)).....well, I just wanted you to know that your dad isn't doing well.

I explained to Mom that I knew he didn't feel well and that his legs hurt. I also explained that he HAD been in the hospital the week before and that was probably what she was remembering and that everything was going to be okay. I told her to please not worry or be upset, that Dad was just taking a nap trying to 'live' through the pain he was in.

That phone call was such an awkward experience for me and by Mom's reaction after Diane mentioned that Dad was asleep in bed that it was just as awkward for Mom.

At the end of our conversation Mom said in tone that seemed to be filled with shame and embarrassment "well, I'm obviously very confused.".

My poor mother. I cannot imagine living in the fear that she must be in constantly.


Lizzie said...

I know how you are feeling. I have the same sad feeling about my mom. I too am always anxious, always thinking about her, wondering what she's feeling. It's our new life now, even though I have a happy life with my kids and grandkids, I also have this part of my life where I am watching my mom slowly slip away. This is so very hard because it feels like a long goodbye. I will check in on you from time to time, and if you want to read my blog, please stop by.

Take care,


Lizzie said...

I wrote that's